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This little trip to Washington was the greatest ever. It was so what I needed and revived so many things in me that seemed to have gotten all muddy and lost in the daily routine of things here in Boston. It was so lovely to see Mash and A and how things will never change with them. Their hearts are so big, you can see it from a distance. Jarns was fun as usual and it reminded me how uniquely hilarious he can make everything. Seeing K was so strange though. It was like a time warp- like we knew all these things about each other but it was also like falling back to the beginning, when everything was surface and fun, except there was no prospect for a development into something better.

I hate the life philosophy that "shit happens, the most you can do is move on". It's a sad resignation to the challenges we feel like we can't handle and instead you should actually fight until the end to preserve what it is you desire. But now I'm realizing that it's not that simple and that at a certain point after you've used every inch of your body, you can't always win. I still don't think that you should give up though, it's just that shit will always happen, but it becomes a part of you. Keeping an open heart and mind to the possibilities, makes it hurt less, and along the way you gather other shit too; until it's the end and you're a giant, beautiful ball of shit and you can reflect back and be thankful for what made you this way.